Thursday, July 1, 2010

New Dream

Recently I turned 29, which at almost 30, surprises me. I don't feel "old" in the cliche "my life is over" way, just surprised that my twenties have slipped through my fingers while I remained unaware. A friend recently said "Don't you think we should just have it all figured out by now?"

Obviously she was speaking in terms of careers and I agreed. It was an interview after all, and she certainly seemed to have it all figured out! But it's something I have been thinking about deeply since then.

I am so grateful for the experiences that I have had; I know I have learned so much and wherever I end up I will bring valuable skills with me. But on the other hand... I've never been in a clear cut job track and it can be frustrating sometimes to not have a place to "settle" forever after that will also feed my family. My mom is an artist and still struggles with this, not knowing when payments are coming in, etc. So what is better: stability or creative fulfillment. I used to think the ladder but working 4 jobs to make ends meet leaves me less fulfilled than one nice paycheck on predictable dates. Maybe I'm not such a free spirit after all, or maybe I am just scared to take a leap onto a dark and uncertain path! I'm curious: where do you guys stand? Freelancing fulfills your dreams or is it more about finding a 9-5 that doesn't leave you morally empty? Consider me officially on the hunt, just a little unsure of what direction to go in... xn

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